The female orgasm - pt.2
Generally women reach orgasm most easily through clitoral stimulation. The clitoris is extremely sensitive to touch of all kinds. Often the head of the clitoris, the pointed tip, is too sensitive for much direct pressure, so focus your attention on the sides.
Touch around the clitoris instead of right on it, at least until her level of excitement increases. The skin tissue of your fingers is not nearly as sensitive as the tissue around her clitoris. But the tissue of your mouth and tongue is an almost perfect match in sensitivity.
Unless you are more highly skilled in using your fingers, it is a much safer way to start by using your mouth for oral stimulation of the clitoris. Experiment with different pressures, strokes and speeds.
Ask her which ones she likes best. A good way to do this is to try two different touches, then ask her if she likes "a" or "b" better. If she's willing, invite her to masturbate for you so you can learn exactly how she likes to be touched.
Many women are shy to do this at first but with some gentle encouragement she may really show her wanton self. It can be a great turn-on for both of you.
Many men are actually quite frightened by a woman who is fully sexually awakened. They may doubt their own ability as a man to keep up, or to be able to perform adequately. They may fear that if she is too much woman sexually for him, that she may go elsewhere and find what she wants.
It may help you to overcome this fear if you remember that you are not responsible for giving your lady sexual satisfaction. She must do that for herself. But if this fear is very strong, you may seek counseling help to deal with it.
When you do find a particular stroke or caress that is really driving her wild, keep doing it and keep doing it and keep doing it. Don't change anything about it. Don't go faster, slower, softer, harder, or switch direction.
Keep doing exactly the same thing until she lets you know she wants a change either through words or body movement.
This holds true whether you're pleasuring her clitorally or vaginally with your fingers or your mouth.
Keep going even if your hands or mouth get really tired! It's a good idea to wait until she is very aroused before entering her vagina either with your fingers or your penis.
Generally if she's not wet, she's not ready. It's as simple as that. If your lover doesn't have a lot of natural vaginal juices even when she is fully aroused be sure to use a good silicone or water-based lubricant.
Nothing can be a quicker turn-off than rough, dry skin rubbing on soft vaginal tissues.
Water-based or silicone lubricant is better because oil can clog the sensitive vaginal tissue. The most sensitive part of a woman's vaginal canal is the first inch to two inches. It's here that most of the nerve endings are located, so when you first enter her concentrate most of your attention there.
The elusive g-spot can usually be found in this general area, on the top of the vaginal wall, a couple of inches in. Imagine a glass lying on the floor. If you reach your first two fingers into the glass at the top, i.e., toward the ceiling rather than the bottom towards the floor, you should find it. It is difficult to reach the g-spot through intercourse, so you will find it much easier with you fingers than with your penis.
There are also some interesting dildos and vibrators with just the right shape to reach the G-spot. Move your index finger or your first two fingers in a "come hither" motion (as if you were asking someone from across the room to come over to where you are) and gently stroke her.
When you touch her g-spot you may notice a more bumpy or raised area of skin, but you may not. The best way to know you've found this highly intense love spot is by her reaction. Where you look is not quite as important as when you look.
Unless she is excited through and through, perhaps from a clitoral orgasm beforehand, it can be difficult to find the g-spot. Stimulation of the g-spot can produce extraordinarily intense orgasms.
As a woman is approaching a g-spot orgasm she may feel she has to urinate. This may immediately cause her to tighten up, stop, and pull back from the edge of bliss. If she can stay relaxed and keep going through that "have-to-pee" sensation it will pass and move on into deep waves of sexual delight.
The woman should urinate before intercourse begins, so she can be more confident that the feeling that she has to urinate is a misleading feeling and can be safely ignored.
For most women it is difficult to reach a climax through intercourse alone. This is because the sensitive clitoris isn't easily stimulated just by thrusting motions; the g-spot is difficult to reach with even a fully erect penis; and because often the male partner goes over the edge into ejaculatory orgasm before the woman has had enough action to bring her to the heights.
If you touch her clitoris before and during intercourse, and if you've pleasured her vaginally by touching the g-spot with your fingers, the chances are much better that she will have a deep vaginal orgasm while your penis is inside her. Learn the strokes that turn her on.
Tell her how fabulous it is that she's sensual and sexual. Let her know you adore her body and love to touch and kiss it for hours. Help her forget about trying to make orgasm happen and focus instead on thoroughly enjoying every moment of lovemaking. If you awaken your multi-orgasmic woman you are going to like it!
Touch around the clitoris instead of right on it, at least until her level of excitement increases. The skin tissue of your fingers is not nearly as sensitive as the tissue around her clitoris. But the tissue of your mouth and tongue is an almost perfect match in sensitivity.Unless you are more highly skilled in using your fingers, it is a much safer way to start by using your mouth for oral stimulation of the clitoris. Experiment with different pressures, strokes and speeds.
Ask her which ones she likes best. A good way to do this is to try two different touches, then ask her if she likes "a" or "b" better. If she's willing, invite her to masturbate for you so you can learn exactly how she likes to be touched.
Many women are shy to do this at first but with some gentle encouragement she may really show her wanton self. It can be a great turn-on for both of you.
Many men are actually quite frightened by a woman who is fully sexually awakened. They may doubt their own ability as a man to keep up, or to be able to perform adequately. They may fear that if she is too much woman sexually for him, that she may go elsewhere and find what she wants.
It may help you to overcome this fear if you remember that you are not responsible for giving your lady sexual satisfaction. She must do that for herself. But if this fear is very strong, you may seek counseling help to deal with it.
When you do find a particular stroke or caress that is really driving her wild, keep doing it and keep doing it and keep doing it. Don't change anything about it. Don't go faster, slower, softer, harder, or switch direction.
Keep doing exactly the same thing until she lets you know she wants a change either through words or body movement.
This holds true whether you're pleasuring her clitorally or vaginally with your fingers or your mouth.
Keep going even if your hands or mouth get really tired! It's a good idea to wait until she is very aroused before entering her vagina either with your fingers or your penis.
Generally if she's not wet, she's not ready. It's as simple as that. If your lover doesn't have a lot of natural vaginal juices even when she is fully aroused be sure to use a good silicone or water-based lubricant.
Nothing can be a quicker turn-off than rough, dry skin rubbing on soft vaginal tissues.
Water-based or silicone lubricant is better because oil can clog the sensitive vaginal tissue. The most sensitive part of a woman's vaginal canal is the first inch to two inches. It's here that most of the nerve endings are located, so when you first enter her concentrate most of your attention there.
The elusive g-spot can usually be found in this general area, on the top of the vaginal wall, a couple of inches in. Imagine a glass lying on the floor. If you reach your first two fingers into the glass at the top, i.e., toward the ceiling rather than the bottom towards the floor, you should find it. It is difficult to reach the g-spot through intercourse, so you will find it much easier with you fingers than with your penis.
There are also some interesting dildos and vibrators with just the right shape to reach the G-spot. Move your index finger or your first two fingers in a "come hither" motion (as if you were asking someone from across the room to come over to where you are) and gently stroke her.
When you touch her g-spot you may notice a more bumpy or raised area of skin, but you may not. The best way to know you've found this highly intense love spot is by her reaction. Where you look is not quite as important as when you look.
Unless she is excited through and through, perhaps from a clitoral orgasm beforehand, it can be difficult to find the g-spot. Stimulation of the g-spot can produce extraordinarily intense orgasms.
As a woman is approaching a g-spot orgasm she may feel she has to urinate. This may immediately cause her to tighten up, stop, and pull back from the edge of bliss. If she can stay relaxed and keep going through that "have-to-pee" sensation it will pass and move on into deep waves of sexual delight.
The woman should urinate before intercourse begins, so she can be more confident that the feeling that she has to urinate is a misleading feeling and can be safely ignored.
For most women it is difficult to reach a climax through intercourse alone. This is because the sensitive clitoris isn't easily stimulated just by thrusting motions; the g-spot is difficult to reach with even a fully erect penis; and because often the male partner goes over the edge into ejaculatory orgasm before the woman has had enough action to bring her to the heights.
If you touch her clitoris before and during intercourse, and if you've pleasured her vaginally by touching the g-spot with your fingers, the chances are much better that she will have a deep vaginal orgasm while your penis is inside her. Learn the strokes that turn her on.
Tell her how fabulous it is that she's sensual and sexual. Let her know you adore her body and love to touch and kiss it for hours. Help her forget about trying to make orgasm happen and focus instead on thoroughly enjoying every moment of lovemaking. If you awaken your multi-orgasmic woman you are going to like it!
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