Say Goodbye to Her Mixed Messages
A
mix of stop signs, green lights and hot and cold behavior from a woman
you are pursuing tends to stir up confusion and questions.
Why wouldn't it if you like her and don't want to give up?
Mixed
signals may take on many forms and are generally a combination of
messages that are hard to decipher. They may be difficult to keep up
with and leave you wondering about her level of interest in you and how she actually feels about you.
Whether
she acts interested but breaks dates with you, will only go out with
you in the company of her friends, contacts you multiple times a day and
then leaves you hanging or needs to reschedule but is unwilling to give
you a specific date or time, I can certainly understand why you feel
confused and frustrated.
There are endless reasons why.
She
may be unsure of what she wants. She may be in a relationship. She may
be attention-seeking and knows you are there to fill that need.
She may be interested in several guys at the same time (and waver on who is at the top of her list). She may be recently single or friendly or scared.
Regardless
of why she is affectionate, interested or attentive and then completely
unavailable or silent, you have the power to make choices that work for
you.
As you evaluate what you want, what to do next and how you should respond to her, here are a few points to consider:
Are you missing the point?
I
have to ask this question first to encourage you to check in with
yourself and take on a reality-based approach to your dilemma.
Sometimes our own assumptions, expectations and desires can get in the way of what is actually happening.
If
you are only looking for green lights, your mind can lead you to
believe a smile from her is a sure sign you're the one. This could lead
you to hear what you want to hear or believe what you want while missing
her clear signals.
Or maybe you are reading into her signals more than you should. She may smile at you, but that does not mean she is into you.
“Connecting with a woman should feelnatural, not like a mind game.”
It's always useful to view her behavior in context.
For example, does she smile and hug every guy around her when she enters the room, or does she greet just you in a special way?
If
she treats all of you similarly, she may just be nice, cuddly or a
flirt. Assess how she treats you while being aware about how she treats
those around her.
Also be sure not to turn her “no
thanks" attitude into convincing yourself she is interested or that she
will be in time. It is crucial to hear what she is saying.
Are her mixed messages a response to yours?
It
is natural to be confused or fearful about relationships at times.
These feelings impact our behavior and may create mixed messages on your
end, so it is important to determine if you are sending her clear
signals.
If you are not calling,
picking her up or spending time with her as you said you would, she may
be relying on mixed messages to evaluate what she wants or protect
herself from getting hurt by you.
If you are interested
in her, you are absolutely allowed to be cautious or anxious. However,
be sure to let her know you like her and keep your word.
Be empowered and know what you deserve.
Be
confident that you can attain the love you are looking for and
understand that you can be decisive with your decisions, choices and
behavior regardless of what you are receiving from her.
A
woman may be beautiful, smart, fun and interesting while also not being
ready for the type of relationship you are looking for.
A
mature woman who likes you and is genuinely interested in getting to
know you will make sure you know she is interested. In this case, her
actions should not leave you feeling insecure, neglected or anxious.
As difficult as dating can seem, connecting with a woman should feel natural, not like a mind game.
Also be sure that you are not guilty of sending mixed messages as a method to protect yourself from the fear of getting attached or hurt.
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